RIP Twitter – “thoughts that came to my mind when I deactivated my twitter account”.
Was that sad? Deactivating my twitter account? In a way..No.. In a way ..Yes. More of no..less of yes. mmm..thanks to me being indifferent towards social networking sites.. and that I don’t get so attached to them.. or the people I meet there. Well..I’ve had my share of lessons you see 🙂
Ok.. I confess I deactivated it not just like that.. but I had my reasons. Now..I wont share all the reasons over here..just that continuing it could lead to some kind of disaster. Now that I don’t tweet much..I find myself more busy..working . I repeat..working..sincerely! 😛 Where twitter was fun..and kept me busy just too much, now I get more time to watch TV or sit outside under the moonshine looking at the sky and those twinkling stars. I get more time to fight with my sister and also, to get apps for my new cell phone. Not that twitter tortured me or wasted my time but still..n of course in these initial days I feel like going back and reactivating the account.. but NO.. I wont.. I guess its time that I should stop feeling bad about things that I do or don’t do..its time that I stop hiding, stop fighting, stop panicking about that which I know wont last forever. I guess its time that I get back to myself.. being real..and miserable..being able to manage my thoughts in other productive ways. I MUST gather myself and I MUST NOT give in to the temptation of tweeting or any such stuff anymore.
I guess I am done with expressing myself too much. I want to see how it feels when you are free of insecurities..when you don’t have to give explanations, when you don’t have to keep things from people you love so much. Having said that, I am going to be…and I will be away from people. I cant live for them people anymore. I know this sounds bad..but who cares! You? mm..well..no-one/thing is more than a passing thought. I know books, music and food will always be there to save me.. so you see..I wont have to try hard :), that’s the best part. Now..Past cannot be controlled or wiped away..so no comment about that.
M just hoping that this chance that I have got to get me out of the mess, I use it to the best. I don’t want any more mistakes on my part. M tired of feeling guilty and sleepless nights. M tired of hurting people..of thinking too much..of repeatedly apologizing to them.. I now wish to make everything right.
Sighh. This doesn’t seems to end. But then I cant keep ranting on n on..I should get back to work.
Tc people. Cya. And.. Keep tweeting! 🙂
demonsofmymind 